重蹈覆辙

原来人类，和机器人并没有什么不同。




除了一颗会跳动真挚的心，

除了一个会思考分析的脑，

除了一张会道人是非的嘴。

人类基本上还不是和机器人一样??

过着一样的生活，重复着每天的定律。

早上起床;
睁开眼睛;
冲洗完毕;
驾车搭车;
上课上班;
吃喝玩乐;
驾车搭车;
冲洗完毕;
上床就寝。

有时候回到家，还要不懂自己怎么会回到家。

有时候吃饭吃着吃着，忘了自己上一餐吃的是什么。

有时候一觉醒来，想想昨天的一切，还会问问自己，昨天的记忆是真的?? 还是梦境??

是因为每天的机遇太相似? 太虚幻? 还是瓶子真的有短暂失忆症? 哈!


每一天，我们都不断重复着这一切。

重复的说话、重复的微笑、重复的哭泣、
重复的做错。

p/s 我已经尽量让自己不再重蹈覆辙，原来还真不简单.....

保护程式

我们很常抱怨。抱怨身体没能好好运作，抱怨没有良好的身材，抱怨……一切一切。殊不知，对待我们最好的就是我们的身体。我们才是没有资格抱怨他们的。



我们的双脚，背负着身体的重量，每天不停地行走。

心脏每天不停的跟着频率地跳，帮我们把血液泵给其他器官。

脑袋瓜，更不用讲啦，每天帮我们分析那些有的没的东西，还要帮我们储存。

其实……有时候，他们也在抱怨啊。


脚……会抽筋。

心……会悸动。

脑……会疼痛。

忽视他们的是我们吧?

以前看过啊，就觉得人的身体真的很特别。他们无时无刻在保护它的主人，只不过我们不懂。

曾经看过的案例是，一个病人腹痛得很厉害。开刀后拿出来一个类似棉花状体的东西。然后棉花里竟然有一个类似弹片的尖锐物品。原来身体为了避免弹片割伤身体的器官，而自己衍生出类似绸丝的包围着弹片。如果不是他保护着它的主人，或许那个人早就因为内出血过度之类的原因死了。哈！

另外一个案例是，一个冲浪者的耳朵自行生多了一块骨头。原因是，因为避免冲浪的时候海水会进入耳朵。

再者，就是创伤创后精神紧张性障碍或是我们俗称的PTSD就是其中一个最好的例子。其中最常见的症状就是短暂失忆。脑袋瓜可爱的把不好的、伤害的、负面的当成电脑般得delete按钮一样，帮我们给删除掉。



你看??人体很微妙吧??


他们其实一直在保护我们呢。=)






p/s: 一个陌生人竟然比我还要了解自己.....

何时

不懂什么时候开始：

瓶子开始猜度每个人的话语

瓶子不再信任单纯的信念

瓶子总是质疑自己的举动

不懂什么时候开始：

身边的人开始用好笑来形容瓶子

身边的人竟然用“随便”来形容瓶子

身边的人开始逐步靠近，而瓶子浑然不觉

不懂什么时候开始：

喜欢上说甜言蜜语

喜欢上听不是事实的谎言

瓶子迷失了自己

p/s: 小时候 哭着哭着就笑了

现在?

笑着笑着竟哭了……

自恋

这一个……好像……是现在社会的其中一个通病??

今天，瓶子和瓶子娘的对话就发现到，原来……瓶子娘也深受其害了。



娘：你读完书那一年，就是我退休那一年也。

瓶子：（算算）诶? 是也~好巧哦。

娘：唉~老咯。五十五岁了……

瓶子：没有啦。你这么漂亮，外表都不像啦。最多嘛三十多岁~

娘：是咩? 真的啊??

瓶子：真的啊，瓶子的娘亲最漂亮了。瓶子都输了。

娘：怎么办啊?

瓶子: 什么怎么办?

娘：就……每个人都这么说哦~怎么我这么靓??

瓶子：是啦是啦……你最靓。瓶子都输你了!!! 我才应该问怎么办吧?? 输给自己的妈妈。（无奈）



虽然，瓶子每次都觉得不可思议，怎么会输给自己的妈妈。可是，又好像是事实。唉~是时候检讨检讨了吗??




p/s: Missing you could turn from pain to pleasure, if I knew you were missing me too.

忽略

原来小岚上个星期去喷漆了。可怜的瓶子竟然在昨天才知道。瓶子一直以为自己的观察力还算不错，可是竟然忽略了小岚。一直到他告诉我，瓶子才去仔细地看清楚小岚。

哦！原来耶~小岚变漂亮了！哈哈哈~然后才被笑：
“你每天驾着他，你不懂得咩???”

好啦，是瓶子疏忽了。=(

“小岚，你别生气哦。待会儿，瓶子带你去洗白白，好不好?? ” =)

身边的人、事、物这么多，要怎样才能做到不忽略所有的一切?

瓶子很想让忽略这一个词消失于瓶子的字典里。
可是很明显的，瓶子不是字典创始人，也不认识他，所以没有办法剔除“忽略”二字。







题外话：
今天老哥临走前问了瓶子说："怎样，有东西要带回去吗??? "



瓶子：“ 带我回去可以吗? ”

=)





p/s: Can you promise not to promise again ?

Because I take it serious =)

星期五

平常的星期五，瓶子会很开心写意的在家睡觉。这一个星期五，却要七早八早起身去学校。事关要交功课啦。本来……瓶子真的本来打算星期四就做好，然后就交掉，可是瓶子不好。结果，唉~自食其果咯。
（谢谢子菲姐的提议，昨天听到的时候，真的有被感动到。=)）

不过今天也幸好有去学校啦。因为后续有活动啦。虽然是临时动议，嗯……算不算呢? 其实他们昨晚就plan好了的，只不过瓶子一直没有答应。哈哈哈~今天，因为她们真的帮了我啦，所以我也不好意思拒绝。更重要的是，这是这一个sem我们这一组这么齐人一起出去!!!
(是不是该反省了我们??? )

在车上，瓶子就笑笑说：

“哇，这个礼拜，我想，最开心就是今天了~”

哪里懂我们亲爱的子菲姐竟然突然冒出一句：

“这可能是这学期最开心的一天。”

哇!瓶子瞬间呆了。对啊，无法不认同她，这一个学期对我们来说都困难重重。而且我们这一组也不懂什么事，最近……唉……
( touch wood touch wood ) 快快把所有的倒霉事，坏事给赶走吧。=)
这个学期已经过了一半了，还有一半而已，我们再努力，一定能够好好的过，是吗???







p/s 七月十五这一天，我会记得的。=)

逃避

想起伤心的五个阶段，才知道原来问题出在：我一直都在第四阶段~

一路以来，我都没有否认，我很在意。

一直以为，不说、不想，会忘了所有的一切。

今天，却让我觉得有些事，不是你说逃避就可以解决。


那些照片，确实让我……想起了你，和你。

原来，我做的这一切是因为你们。

我变成这样，也是拜你们所赐。

我没有怪你们。
我知道思想这回事很特别，我们控制不了。

可是很多事，不是说你想做就做的不是吗?

今天， 朋友问起，才发现自己背负的太多。
我让他装了太多别人的故事，却忘了储存自己的故事。
所以错的人，是我吗??

p/s: 今晚真的不是一个emo的好时机，因为那该死的film analysis。

我也想离开，可以吗??

Universe and U

A fire burns
Water comes
You cool me down
When I'm cold inside
You are warm and bright
You know you are so good for me
With your child's eyes
You are more than you seem
You see into space
I see in your face
The places you've been
The things you have learned
They sit with you so beautifully

You know there's no need to hide away
You know I tell the truth
We are just the same
I can feel everything you do
Hear everything you say
Even when you're miles away
Cause I am me, the universe and you

Just like stars burning bright
Making holes in the night
We are building bridges

You know

When you're on your own
I'll send you a sign
Just so you know
I am me, the universe and you

Get hook by another GA's song. I couldn't stop myself from listening this song these two days. The music is just soft yet sad ? But the lyrics is sweet ? and touch !
By the way, only love the version that sang by Arizona and Callie. Callie might not an good or the favorite actress for me in GA, but I can't deny that her voice is kinda powerful.



p/s: There is something that need no reason right ?

毛龟（二）

瓶子在电脑前面发呆，望过去发现毛龟也在盯着瓶子。


瓶子：干嘛?? 发呆不行啊?

毛龟：我啥都没说啊……

瓶子：你的眼神明明就……充满了鄙视的眼神！你不要以为我疼你就大完啊~

毛龟：我只不过疑惑你在干嘛。

瓶子：都说了发呆咯！

毛龟：在想啥?? 想裸龟??? （ 逐步接近瓶子，看看瓶子的反应）

瓶子：（撇开眼神）才没有。

毛龟：那……

瓶子：干嘛啦，你今天到底想怎样??

毛龟：没有啦，就想……再看看你而已。

瓶子：看啥? 还不是这样?

毛龟：我只是想看清楚，你……还是你吗??

瓶子：你这是啥问题?? 我再怎样变，都是疼你的啦。这样满意了吗???

毛龟：那……

瓶子：到底你要问什么??? 速速招来！不然……

毛龟：不然什么??不然什么??? 你也要把我送出去??? ( 扑到瓶子前面)

瓶子：好啊你，原来你是怕我把你送出去。难怪今天一副好声好气，别别扭扭的样子。（盯着毛龟）

毛龟：（避开瓶子的眼神）才没有，我只不过怕你寂寞。我知道你不可能忍受失去我。

瓶子：你…… 我……

毛龟：哈哈哈哈！看吧！我就知道！（一副傲气的转身走掉）




毛龟又把瓶子给逗笑了。哈！



p/s 我们始终都在练习微笑，终于变成不敢哭的人

Smile

Today such a tough day for me. But my title today seems so positive. ha ! It is because this is how I deal with all those tough things today.

Early in the morning, scolded by a lecturer. Never happened in my degree life I guess ? and I smiled to her. Then she just walked away. Although at last she didn't ban my idea. But... I'm wondering am I able to do it? Well, I should have do it. At least try it right ? =)

Afternoon, I passed up the assignment. And sir seems like not really agree with the idea or.. whatever. It just the comment was all negative. I know what he said is right. But is just... disappointed with it. But I believe,we only worth on how much effort that we put in. So, the conclusion must be, I didn't put as much as possible punya effort into it. So that's what I get. And I smiled to him when he was trying to told me all those negative messages. What can I do besides smiling ? The point is not with me, I can't argue with him. So the only thing I can do is smiling. =)

And then,

Everyone was asking me today :" Why?"

So I smiled and answered:" Why not ? "

It seems weird to them. But I feel as long as both we are happy with it then why not right ?

There is so many things if we think positively, we can live happily for sure.

In fact,

I love rainy day rather than sunny day.

I love those dark colors than the bright colors.

I love the silence instead of the crowd.

Maybe it is just my fate that I'm not an optimistic kid.

I'm used to it and I accept it because at least I know how to put on a smile on my face.

=)




p/s Feeling comes and goes in wave....

起因

记忆烂。

本来就是瓶子的强项。本来就是瓶子的标记。

或许这是其中一个瓶子放弃中文学原因。不过也过去了，瓶子也不想追究起因了。

身边一些人甚至过分到，每次忘了什么东西，都把责任推给瓶子，说接近瓶子太多了。事实真的是这样吗?? 瓶子都几乎被迷惑了。

瓶子相信除了疾病外，还是有其他东西会传染的。

就好像，两个人整天相处，会不由自主的模仿对方的举止，语言。这就是为什么，有人整天说：“哇，好有夫妻相”。原则上，还是有理可究。至于记忆力的传染，瓶子还真的没读过，看过这方面的研究。

所以……瓶子身边的人不要再随便诬赖瓶子了！


今天的这一篇，是因为……躺在床上一天。瓶子看了一本，很奇怪、无厘头、无道理、无所谓的书。不可置信的是，瓶子还真的坚持把它给看完了。不过，消化不了也是真的。是它太深奥? 还是瓶子太肤浅? 不！得出来的结论，是那本书的作者太任性，故事太随意。

他赢了，每一次他写的书都让瓶子吃惊。这一次，吃惊的原因是：瓶子真的真的不懂瓶子看了什么??? 唉~

对了，主题是，躺了一天，然后……想了一天。功课，人、事、物…… 才发现自己的记忆力，还是这么的弱。好多事，原来瓶子都记不起起因了。唉~所以说，写下来真的是最好的管道。

不过，这么懒的瓶子，能不能持之于恒，又是题外话了。=)




p/s 你记得那个起因吗???

Blessed

" All of my friends think that I'm blessed,
They don't know my head is a mess. "
( Love this song a lot !! )

There was so many things happened recently. So many people around me including me were/are in a emo period. All of us just can't find our way out and feel real helpless.


I heard what they said,

I asked what they want,

I answered what they wish.

Sometimes I'm glad that I can be that role to help them, share with them,be there with them.

But is that really work ?
Is that really what help them ?
I wonder ....

Today I was giving advice to one of my friend and said:
You shouldn't be like this anymore. You should know how to reject and say " NO".

But what am I doing now ? hahaha~ feel so ... pointless that I said out those words. Even I know I don't mind to listen, but somehow, I still can't ... I can't.. huff... I can't even find a word to describe my feeling now. It is a mix feeling !


There is a line between a real friend and listener. But I guess no one can get what is the difference. I know what is it. And I know which one am I. I hope to change, but every time thing happens, and I just play back my own role and can't change it anymore.


I know I shouldn't ..

I know I should..

Somehow,
I still... remain the same me.


That's why I always have a wall with them?
That's why they never get close to me?
Finally I get what she meant last time.
That is the real me.


I really hope all of you get back to the normal routine as soon as possible.
You.. You... You.... and You... =)
( Pray hard !)

p/s: What I learn is how to listen and answer, but I never learn how to share.

不了

有一個精神病人，以為自己是一隻蘑菇，於是他每天都撐著一把傘蹲在房間的牆角裡，不吃也不喝，像一隻真正的蘑菇一樣。

有一天，心理醫生也撐了一把傘，蹲坐在了病人的旁邊。

病人很奇怪地問：你是誰呀？

醫生回答：我也是一隻蘑菇呀。

病人點點頭，繼續做他的蘑菇。

過了一會兒，醫生站了起來，在房間裡走來走去。

病人就問他：你不是蘑菇麼，怎麼可以走來走去？

醫生回答說：蘑菇當然也可以走來走去啦！

病人覺得有道理，就也站起來走走。 又過了一會兒，醫生拿出一個漢堡包開始吃...

病人又問：咦，你不是蘑菇麼，怎麼可以吃東西？

醫生理直氣壯地回答：蘑菇當然也可以吃東西呀！

病人覺得很對，於是也開始吃東西。 幾個星期以後，這個精神病人就能像正常人一樣生活了，雖然，他還覺得自己是一隻蘑菇。 其實…… 一個人可以帶著過去的創傷繼續，只要他把悲傷放在心裡的一個圈圈裡，不要讓苦痛浸染了他的整個生命，他就可以像正常人一樣快樂地生活。

當一個人悲傷得難以自持的時候，也許，他不需要太多的勸解和安慰，訓誡和指明，他需要的，只是能有一個人在他身邊蹲下來，陪他做一隻蘑菇。

你……

还是get不到，

我……

决定放弃了。

有多少人了, 那背后的意义?

如果你选择装不了，选择去逃避，选择被蒙蔽……

我选择沉默

p/s : Maybe I don't know what I want, but I pretty sure what I don't want ~

不懂我的蘑菇在哪里?

头发

昨天……又跑去走家俬店。真的没有计划的，不懂为啥表姐突然也兴致起，就这样停在家俬店前~哈！然后又看中一个太空椅！唉~以后一定要把它搬回家！哈！它的真身比相片好看，所以……瓶子不放照片了。哈~

有时候真的顶不顺自己和表姐的默契。咱俩性格满相像的。然后……瓶子终于找到一人比瓶子还要懒的人！

咱俩躺在梳化上休息，然后……她用脚夹食物也！哈哈哈~这一点，和瓶子不相上下。

这个就是懒人的做法啦！
VO：eh eh eh ~ 差少少差少少
结果?
Haiyeeerrrr~
一副不甘愿的起身拿！
hahahahahha !!

然后，她一直嘀咕说要不要冲凉。瓶子就说睡觉吧，睡了就不会想冲凉了。瓶子真的以为这个是最懒的极限了。结果她说：“我脱衣服，然后你帮我冲好了。”

啊！！！！！瓶子彻底的输了！瓶子再懒都不会要别人帮瓶子冲凉的说！哈哈哈哈~

第一次找到比瓶子还懒的人，有少许的开心。哈！嘘~~~

今天又突发奇想跑出去。瓶子压抑了两天，一直在压抑想剪头发的冲动~从以前就有一个习惯，就是心情不好爱剪头发（难怪现在头发越来越短）。结果，今天傍晚，终于压抑不了。情绪低到一个极点。终于第一次在这里剪头发了！！！！ 哇~

结果………………………………???

头发是剪了，头发是短了。

可是……心情……









没改变。


她说：因为头发不要再做你的发泄品了。


然后~ 瓶子醒觉了。原来如此…… =)



p/s：我对你很礼貌？？那只是代表我和你不熟而已，醒觉吧！

Dream

Everyone has a Dream.

A dream about her future husband.

A dream about how fantastic career that he would has.

A dream about they will have a smart kid that becoming the mayor of the city.

hahhaha~

But me ? I only have a little dream for going to IKEA and take a walk. I don't even know is this able to count as a dream. Because it seems so so so small and tiny until so easy to get it. And when I told my cousin last week, she was keep laughing and said :" ou ! then you better don't go to IKEA too fast, because then you have no dream anymore ~ "

I will still have plenty of tiny dreams even if I go to IKEA ok ? For example ,

1. Zoo Negara ( our group plan for a long time but until now.. still pending.. haiz.. )

2. Museum Negara ( ops.. this!! I went last sem ! YAY ! )

3. Going to the cinema with a group of people but all of us sit separately.

4. Sitting on the chair that provide by the shopping mall, and then observe those people who go to shop for whole day long.

5. Watching a movie marathon from noon til midnight. ( I guess I gonna die after step out from the cinema )

6. Go to Genting for no reason but just to get some fresh cold air then go home. ( This is what my friend told me before what she has done and I felt insane that time. But now I feel .. hmm.. it is FUN ! )

7. Left the exam paper whole blank for at least once !!!
( ok.. I'm don't think I gonna do this in my Uni life. But now only I realize I have done this before. Where it is when I'm form six and it is the essay part of the chinese paper. I was emo that time, went out the classroom then met my chinese teacher and I was asking her :" I'm moody now and don't want to do the essay part, can I ? " and what she replied me that surprised me. It is because she said :" ok.. but make sure you won't do it again next time when in final exam , ok ? " hahahah~ I don't believe I did such "BRAVE" thing ever. I really have to admit that I'm not a good student at all. =) )

8. Dye my hair into Silver color.
( ok~ I guess my dad won't let me go in home )

9. SHOOT the people that I hate face to face and put on a REAL joker face towards them !
( ok.. Mum told me to be a polite person. So I won't do it neither. )

10. Get rid all my bad habits. ( huff.. can I ?? )


SEE ! I still able to write it down 10 little tiny dreams even if I go to IKEA. hahahah~ Now only I realize I've been here for two year, how ridiculous that I never step into it ? hahah~ OK ! There must be a day I complete all my tiny tasks ! Well, can I ? =)

Another story : There is always a reason , but I can't find the reason why I love to shop furniture shop. It is just feel so warm and peace for me when I'm inside the furniture shop. Maybe that is the place for a family or a couple to start a new life. I went to a furniture shop couple of days ago, and I saw a swing. I swear to God that is the most comfortable swing I sat before and I love it ! It is made by rotan ! But I didn't ask the price because I know I'm not going to buy it. I will own a swing in my house one day later ! *finger crossed* Another thing I want in my house is all the furniture are in black and white color. And no kiddo for sure. Because kiddo will destroy the white white furniture ! hahaah~ I'm not prejudice on kids, but just... Kids are so scary even they put on their angel smile. They are born to be a destroyer. OK ! I know I was a kid before, that's why I love my parent so much. =)




p/s :Dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow.

七月一日

终于七月了！一直告诉自己，所有的一切六月完了，就会跟着结束。所以~今天是全新的一个月！

事实也证明没错！只不过刚踏入七月的三个小时，瓶子就觉得心情棒透了。哈！

Super 8 真的是一部很棒的戏！虽然剧情有点夸张……可是拍摄到真的没话讲！那个阵容，是香港中国他们都做不出的爆破场面！！！里面的角色更是……哇！年纪小小，就演技一流~瓶子敢说，谁没看这套戏，真的是会后悔的！瓶子实在应该劝我们的导师用这一套片做Film Analysis~ 哈哈哈！

除了灯光外，瓶子找不到其他的破绽。不过现在想想，可能那样的灯光是为了营造那个时代的摄影器材所拍出来的感觉。不管啦~反正他一定有他的用意，我们观众没抓到，是我们还没有到达那个程度。没关系~至少瓶子还是对这部片至上无上的敬意！






p/s 还是百载未逢的美丽 得到过又促逝 也有一种智慧...